My man has pushed the boundaries. We are almost at 42 weeks and getting ready to pack up and go to the hospital Sunday night so I can be induced. Friday night into Saturday I had some really intense contractions but nothing I couldn't work through, and certainly nothing that was consistent or predictable.
I am full of all kinds of emotions ranging from excitement to paralyzing fear. On one hand I feel so incredibly grateful to have made it this far and to be in this position of having a healthy baby that is 100% us. But the overriding emotion is that of disappointment and upset over having to kick off this labor and delivery with a medical intervention. This is exactly what I did NOT want to happen. I know that the Pitocin + baby's heart rate = frantic doctors suggesting c- sections. And even if that doesn't happen, Pitocin is supposed to make your labor go from 0 to 60 and makes it almost impossible for the mother not to have some kind of pain relief. The domino effect will be at work and I hope I am strong enough to resist it. I will try my hardest, but Luke, I want to apologize in advance for the drugs that we are going to give to you before you even take your first breath. I have tried for the last 10 months to protect you from outside pollutants and here we are, about to give you (and me) something that goes against everything I stand for. I tried the red raspberry tea, the evening primrose oil, and any other way to get prostaglandins in my system (without going into details). But the fact remains that you have stayed in there past the date that the medical community considers safe and reasonable so now you must be coaxed out, ready or not. For that, I am sorry. I hope one day we will live in a world where the human gestational period can be further pinpointed and the 42 week window becomes an outdated concept. If I could go beyond 42 weeks, I would. I would wait for you to decide when the time is right.
Nevertheless, we are overjoyed and cannot wait to meet you FINALLY! Even if you are not ready to meet us yet...
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Sunday, June 24, 2012
41 weeks- Never thought I'd get here! Sitting, Waiting, Wishing...
So, I did not think I would make it this far along, but here we are- almost 41 weeks and performing non- stress testing and ultrasounds every other day to make sure the little guy is still thriving in there. The main things they are looking for are 1) a good amount of amniotic fluid, 2) fetal movement/heart rate, 3) practice breathing, and 4) the placenta to ensure it's not starting to break down.
I said it before and I'll say it again that I HATE the concept of "due" dates. It sets this expectation in everyone's (including my own!) mind and when you don't hit the date it's like panic sets in. The majority of babies born to first-time moms are born after their "due" dates. One of the reasons that we have seen such a rise in cesarean rates is due to the fact that many OBs are opting to induce at 41 weeks or sooner. The latest research suggests that inductions increase your risk of surgical birth by more than 67%. It is believed that the baby sends a signal (hormone or chemical) that starts the labor process (in conjunction with a ripe and ready cervix). In most doula, OB and midwives' books, as long as mom and baby are both healthy, it doesn't make sense to mess with that system. There are real risks that come with induction.
http://www.midwiferytoday.com/articles/timely.asp
So during the past week I have had numerous calls, texts and emails from friends and family wondering where Luke is. I know they mean well, but I never knew people could be so obsessed with the arrival. It is almost annoying. No one wants him to come more than me and his daddy. Only he and God will decide his birthday. So until he decides it's time to come out we have the birth announcement all ready for him, we just need the date and stats! Might have to change that date to July though...
I said it before and I'll say it again that I HATE the concept of "due" dates. It sets this expectation in everyone's (including my own!) mind and when you don't hit the date it's like panic sets in. The majority of babies born to first-time moms are born after their "due" dates. One of the reasons that we have seen such a rise in cesarean rates is due to the fact that many OBs are opting to induce at 41 weeks or sooner. The latest research suggests that inductions increase your risk of surgical birth by more than 67%. It is believed that the baby sends a signal (hormone or chemical) that starts the labor process (in conjunction with a ripe and ready cervix). In most doula, OB and midwives' books, as long as mom and baby are both healthy, it doesn't make sense to mess with that system. There are real risks that come with induction.
http://www.midwiferytoday.com/articles/timely.asp
So during the past week I have had numerous calls, texts and emails from friends and family wondering where Luke is. I know they mean well, but I never knew people could be so obsessed with the arrival. It is almost annoying. No one wants him to come more than me and his daddy. Only he and God will decide his birthday. So until he decides it's time to come out we have the birth announcement all ready for him, we just need the date and stats! Might have to change that date to July though...
Monday, June 18, 2012
40 weeks- Happy Birthday and Father's Day to my man!
What a wonderful weekend we had! No baby yet, but we had the most GORGEOUS weather (75 and sunny all weekend long) and managed to stay relaxed while getting a few more things done for the munchkin!
Friday was my last day at work before maternity leave, and I had a doctor's appointment in the morning. No dilation, no effacement, but measuring on target and cervix is still soft. But my due date is technically today so I wasn't that worried. We scheduled me for a final appointment next Friday, with possible induction needed on June 24. He said he would do a Foley bulb induction to get me to 3 cm then would start Pitocin. That scares me so much, since I know the C- Section rate int he US is about 70% due to inductions at 41 weeks. But we won't think about that yet. On the way to work, I got a flat tire from some chunk of metal that was sitting in the road, and I ended up waiting an hour an a half for AAA to get there to change my tire. On the up side, I was in a really nice neighborhood with my car parked under a tree, and it was sunny and 70 so I was just surfing the net on my phone for awhile. After that, I did go into work for only a half hour to gather some things and say goodbye, then I was off to run errands the rest of the day. I ended up spending most of the day on our rockers outside reading my baby books. So relaxing!
Saturday was M's 37th birthday, and he was out most of the morning at his parent's house helping his dad on a project he promised to do for him for Father's Day. I just did some chores and by the time he got home, it was time to cook his birthday dinner of grilled veggies and tofu dogs! We sat outside for the rest of the beautiful evening and just relaxed again, anticipating the big guy! M's birthday present was an iphone and he loved it!
Sunday it was mommy's turn to be pampered- I got a mani/pedi then we went up to my sister and brother in law's for Father's day dinner. I got M a Father's day gift (I had hoped he would be a father by June 17th!)....a tee shirt that says "Luke I am your father" from Star Wars, and some Flyers gear for the little guy. It was nice again to be waited on by everyone at my in laws'...I sat on a nice reclining chair in the shade and just sipped some water with lemon! It was heaven! Just what the doctor ordered before the storm hits :-)
Yesterday was also very interesting because at about 2:30AM, I lost my mucous plug. There was absolutely no doubt about it and I even showed M because we were wondering if I had lost it earlier in the day. I know it doesn't technically mean anything because people can lose their plug and have nothing happen for weeks, but it was still at least a sign that I'm now dilated, which is a change from Friday's doctor's appointment. I started to have very weird pains (I think they were light contractions, but who knows?!) about every 30 minutes last night from 2:30AM until about 5:30AM. They finally went away and I slept until 8:30AM this morning. I was bummed...I was hoping they would get stronger and not go away. I was hoping this was the beginning of "the" day. The first day of the rest of our lives.
So here we are, Monday morning, my "due" date, and nothing...so far. I hate the "due" date concept because it assumes everyone is the same and every baby will come exactly 40 weeks from a woman's last period and that's just not how it works! My doula is very good at reminding me of that....
Friday was my last day at work before maternity leave, and I had a doctor's appointment in the morning. No dilation, no effacement, but measuring on target and cervix is still soft. But my due date is technically today so I wasn't that worried. We scheduled me for a final appointment next Friday, with possible induction needed on June 24. He said he would do a Foley bulb induction to get me to 3 cm then would start Pitocin. That scares me so much, since I know the C- Section rate int he US is about 70% due to inductions at 41 weeks. But we won't think about that yet. On the way to work, I got a flat tire from some chunk of metal that was sitting in the road, and I ended up waiting an hour an a half for AAA to get there to change my tire. On the up side, I was in a really nice neighborhood with my car parked under a tree, and it was sunny and 70 so I was just surfing the net on my phone for awhile. After that, I did go into work for only a half hour to gather some things and say goodbye, then I was off to run errands the rest of the day. I ended up spending most of the day on our rockers outside reading my baby books. So relaxing!
Saturday was M's 37th birthday, and he was out most of the morning at his parent's house helping his dad on a project he promised to do for him for Father's Day. I just did some chores and by the time he got home, it was time to cook his birthday dinner of grilled veggies and tofu dogs! We sat outside for the rest of the beautiful evening and just relaxed again, anticipating the big guy! M's birthday present was an iphone and he loved it!
Sunday it was mommy's turn to be pampered- I got a mani/pedi then we went up to my sister and brother in law's for Father's day dinner. I got M a Father's day gift (I had hoped he would be a father by June 17th!)....a tee shirt that says "Luke I am your father" from Star Wars, and some Flyers gear for the little guy. It was nice again to be waited on by everyone at my in laws'...I sat on a nice reclining chair in the shade and just sipped some water with lemon! It was heaven! Just what the doctor ordered before the storm hits :-)
Yesterday was also very interesting because at about 2:30AM, I lost my mucous plug. There was absolutely no doubt about it and I even showed M because we were wondering if I had lost it earlier in the day. I know it doesn't technically mean anything because people can lose their plug and have nothing happen for weeks, but it was still at least a sign that I'm now dilated, which is a change from Friday's doctor's appointment. I started to have very weird pains (I think they were light contractions, but who knows?!) about every 30 minutes last night from 2:30AM until about 5:30AM. They finally went away and I slept until 8:30AM this morning. I was bummed...I was hoping they would get stronger and not go away. I was hoping this was the beginning of "the" day. The first day of the rest of our lives.
So here we are, Monday morning, my "due" date, and nothing...so far. I hate the "due" date concept because it assumes everyone is the same and every baby will come exactly 40 weeks from a woman's last period and that's just not how it works! My doula is very good at reminding me of that....
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Monday, June 11, 2012
39 weeks- Top 10
Top 10 things I've loved about this pregnancy
1. Continuous monitoring in the first trimester
2. Feeling the little guy move
3. Fetal Dopplers in the first trimester
4. Klondike Neapolitan ice cream bars & pizza, pizza, pizza
5. Maternity Jeans and all things without buttons
6. Being waited on because I'm not one to ask for help
7. M's patience
8. Monthly ultrasounds
9. Registering- first I started out with all neutral clothes but then I decided not to fight it :-)
10. It's a miracle!
Top 10 things I've hated about this pregnancy
1. Numb hands since 28 weeks!
2. Swollen ankles and feet
3. The fact that in my third trimester I can't do all of the running around that I used to do!
4. Walking on eggshells until I could feel him moving
5. IVF, though this could also be a LOVE because it ended up bringing us Luke
6. Burst capillaries at 10 weeks
7. Not being able to roll myself out of bed since 30 weeks
8. End of pregnancy 5 times a night pee breaks
9. My nesting urges- I am very organized but I think I've taken it to a new level during this pregnancy and made those around me absolutely nuts!
10. Feeling "not ready" pretty much all the time
I think we are as ready as we are going to be after this weekend, as you can see from the nursery pictures. As I write, the granite people are here installing the new counter tops, sink and faucet.
Once that is done, this baby can feel free to pop his head out (lol) any time he wants. I really am getting impatient to see his little face. I know he is going to be our perfect little angel and we will love him more than we've ever loved anything in this world.
1. Continuous monitoring in the first trimester
2. Feeling the little guy move
3. Fetal Dopplers in the first trimester
4. Klondike Neapolitan ice cream bars & pizza, pizza, pizza
5. Maternity Jeans and all things without buttons
6. Being waited on because I'm not one to ask for help
7. M's patience
8. Monthly ultrasounds
9. Registering- first I started out with all neutral clothes but then I decided not to fight it :-)
10. It's a miracle!
Top 10 things I've hated about this pregnancy
1. Numb hands since 28 weeks!
2. Swollen ankles and feet
3. The fact that in my third trimester I can't do all of the running around that I used to do!
4. Walking on eggshells until I could feel him moving
5. IVF, though this could also be a LOVE because it ended up bringing us Luke
6. Burst capillaries at 10 weeks
7. Not being able to roll myself out of bed since 30 weeks
8. End of pregnancy 5 times a night pee breaks
9. My nesting urges- I am very organized but I think I've taken it to a new level during this pregnancy and made those around me absolutely nuts!
10. Feeling "not ready" pretty much all the time
I think we are as ready as we are going to be after this weekend, as you can see from the nursery pictures. As I write, the granite people are here installing the new counter tops, sink and faucet.
Once that is done, this baby can feel free to pop his head out (lol) any time he wants. I really am getting impatient to see his little face. I know he is going to be our perfect little angel and we will love him more than we've ever loved anything in this world.
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
38 weeks
I am officially up 40 lbs from where I started back in September. Mama is getting big! So is baby…I believe truly that he will be definitely over 7 lbs when he is born, closer to 8 lbs. Just something I’m feeling. If he’s not, well then I don’t know what to say. I’ve been trying to get in all my junk food eating before I give birth because afterwards I’m declaring jihad on my fat pregnancy body. Breastfeeding coupled with some exercise and a juice/raw foods fast should hopefully put me right back to where I was pre-IVF. If I can lose the 40 lbs and then some I will be SO HAPPY this summer. I am really ready to hit it hard, I just feel so disgusting and I know I look pretty disgusting too.
Last week’s appointment was uneventful- still measuring on target with low blood pressure, everything looking good. I’m not dilated at all but, again, he said my cervix is soft. My doula said that doesn’t mean anything, as things can happen really fast when you are in labor. Consequently we had our last pre-natal visit with Doula Nikki last week during a wicked thunderstorm and had to light candles for the 3 hour session! But it was really fun- we LOVE HER and I’ve already purchased a $100 spa giftcard for her after our labor/birth. I would recommend her to anyone, she is just so great- so knowledgeable and informed without being overbearing and making you feel like it’s her way or the highway. I feel like we have a childbirth “team” consisting of me, M, and Nikki and I think we will work very well together when the moment arises! I can’t wait to go through this experience and I know it will be a positive and rewarding one. She was able to share a couple of positive recent birth stories that she had, one being at the hospital we will deliver at. That’s the second good “natural” birth story that I have heard at our hospital and my hopes are very high that we will get the care we are wishing for.
I also reviewed the birth plan with my doc at Friday’s appointment and he didn’t seem to have any concerns at all about what we were trying to accomplish. He was actually very PRO dimming the lights, using the mirror, using a birth ball, stool or bars on the bed to hang with. He said our hospital has gone from one extreme to the other and he is happy to see the changes in effect. There is no nursery at our hospital, only 24 hour in rooming with the baby, along with skin to skin contact whenever possible. These are all things I’m adamant about, so I feel like we won’t have to “fight” to get our natural un-medicated birth like I thought we would have. I’m feeling very relaxed about the whole thing and am very confident in my choice to not go to the birth center. Of course, the plan is to labor at home as long as possible before going in, just in case. I wouldn’t want to go in any less than 6/7 cm in order to avoid being put on their clock to labor and deliver. Doula Nikki says when we leave the house anyway sphincter law kicks in so there will be some backsliding anyway as most people don’t deliver their babies in cars on the way to the hospital.
Other than that, we are just continuing to prepare Luke’s room for his arrival! Only a couple more things on our list- install black out shades, hang pictures, hang the baby monitor and put the exersaucer together! We put the high chair together and stroller, swing and car seat are ready to go. My sister in law is letting me borrow her snap n’ go (which is so lightweight) and I have the diaper bag all packed and ready! All I really need is the baby. Things are going so well it almost makes me think that things are going TOO well. I hate when I do this to myself. Now I think something bad is going to happen to combat all of the good things going on in my life…why do I always do that?!
He is on the move all the time, albeit running out of space in there. He kicks and squirms from 10-11am, then around dinner, then again after 830pm. I wonder if he already has his little sleep schedule in there. I do feel hiccups sometimes, they are so cute. I feel them down near my upper thigh, where his head must be. I feel little thumps that come at equal intervals and it cracks me up. I still talk to him every day and tell him that whenever he is ready to come out is fine with us. I tell him it’s completely up to him and we will wait until he’s ready to greet us. I have these little tinglies in my belly when I think about him and how much I love him. I just can’t wait to kiss him and snuggle him in person. Doing it from in the womb is getting old.
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