28 weeks- Friday night horror story

 I have not only welcomed my third trimester this week, but have also welcomed a brand new pregnancy symptom- pregnancy induced carpal tunnel syndrome! I noticed it last week when I would wake up in the middle of the night and one or both of my entire arms were on pins and needles so painfully I couldn't roll myself over.   Then I realized that in my right hand, the numbness in my fingers seemed to last all day long.  Now I just ignore the all day numbness in my middle and ring fingers- I forget what it feels like to have a normal hand.  Sleeping is still pretty painful, but I sleep on my left side and prop my right arm up on a pillow that I have between me & M, and that seems to keep the pain to a minimum.  Who knew?!

This past Friday was the second and final installment of our birth class at the Birth Center.  All in all it was a very worthwhile class and I'm glad we took it.  However, during class we heard a horror story that I will NOT soon forget.  So, one of the girls in our class was going to be having her second baby at the Birth Center.  Her first birth was at the hospital we will be delivering at, and she admitted she was had not done her research on natural birth or taken classes to prepare herself like she should have.  When she was about 6 cm dilated, I suppose she "broke down" when one of the nurses strongly suggested an epidural to her.  As she said, she wasn't prepared for the obstacles she would face in the hospital.  As soon as she had the epidural, within 5 minutes her baby's heart rate dropped and so did hers.  They rushed her off for an "emergency" c- section, and her son was born without incident and there was nothing wrong with him.  However, during her c- section, the epidural she had traveled up instead of down her body.  She said her arms and face were numb and she could feel everything from the waist down.  When asked by the anesthesiologist if she was ok, she lied and said yes because she knew if he knew that she wasn't, he would try to put her completely under then she wouldn't see her baby for another few hours. Afterwards they got her records from the hospital and the reason for the emergency c- section was not documented anywhere.  That story scares the you- know- what out of me for so many reasons.  Right then and there we started to re-think a Birth Center birth.

Two days later, on Sunday, we had the first prenatal appointment with our doula, Nikki.  It was a three hour appointment full of great information, and some even duplicative information from our Birth Center class.  But that is ok with me because I learn better with repetition! We discussed how much harder her job is at a hospital than at a birth center because there is always someone coming into the room trying to disrupt your focus.  We chatted for awhile about our options and have decided to explore the birth center option one more time and we are going on a tour this coming Wednesday evening, followed by our hospital tour on Friday evening.  I have about 4 more weeks to make a final decision (assuming the birth center has availability on my due date), as they will only accept me up to 34 weeks.  I almost want to have a dream or some kind of "sign" to tell me what to do.  I don't want to go to the hospital and end up having an unnecessary medical intervention that leads to a c section, nor do I want to end up at the birth center and have some kind of emergency.  It is such a double edged sword. Couple this with the fact that I just heard another birth story today that started out with a mom in perfect labor, getting ready to push, when the baby was at 2 station and the umbilical cord was wrapped around her torso so she was getting no oxygen and hear heart rate was 40 bpm (should be way higher). After a few minutes of putting the mom in a bunch of different positions to try to get the baby to move, it was of no avail and she had to have a c- section.  What would I have done in that situation if I wasn't in a hospital?!  It's like I want to have my cake and eat it too, but I don't know how realistic that is.  

I have a LOT more thinking and research to do.

27 weeks- Crazy Week

Oh man, this past week was nuts!  I forgot how much I hate doing things during the week- it throws me off my routine and I get all disheveled.

• Tuesday- sucked into a presentation by one of my neighbors trying to sell me something. I end up purchasing a year long membership to something I will not need and never use.  Commence financial guilt and I am currently looking for a way to cancel within three months
• Tuesday & Wednesday- Ceiling painter comes in to do the baby's room, our kitchen, master bath and master bedroom due to cracking and nail pops.  He leaves my house in shambles, covered in paint dust and dried bits of paint everywhere, including on furniture, hardwoods and appliances.  It takes me 3 , 4 hour evenings of cleaning to get everything back to normal
• Thursday- Two hour fetal ecocardiogram with my mom (starting at 8am) followed by 4pm settlement on our refinance- finally!!
• Friday- Three hour birthing class- the first of two - that I was looking forward to!  We were late and M had to step out multiple times due to an emergency at work
• Saturday- Wedding shower an hour away

 Blah!  I am glad it's a new week and I have nothing going on this week except an eye doc appointment and the last three hour birthing class.

The fetal ecocardiogram went really well on Thursday.  Nothing of note, just spent 1.5 hours inspecting his heart and got some great 3D images of the little guy.  I brought my mom, which went really well.  I am glad she got to see how everything works and got to be part of it since M couldn't be there.  If I were her, I would want my daughter to take me along too so even thought I don't think she understands much of it I think it was a nice thing to do.  At first I thought she'd be more emotional but she really wasn't; I think she was just amazed at the technology. 

The birth class we went to at the Birth Center this week was really awesome.  It was taught by a nurse from Jennersville Hospital who also used to work at the Hospital of the University of Penn.  She is an advocate of natural childbirth and the class itself was to prepare us for natural childbirth in the hospital setting.  She went through a slideshow and showed us some relaxation techniques, massage, and other ways to cope with pain.  She also described how labor might feel, how we would know when it started and the timeline we expect it to take. Next week I think they are showing more videos of birth and we are supposed to go into "mock" labor and we'll practice what we've learned.  I'm excited because next weekend is also our first doula prenatal appointment and I'm looking forward to see how much Nikki's teachings correspond to this birthing class.  I am thinking about getting a birth ball (i.e. an exercise ball) to use during labor. 

At this point, if I don't get to have my natural labor I will be crushed.  I have such a strong feeling towards doing this my way and on my terms that accepting anything less would just be unfathomable to me.  I want him to come into the world in the most natural way possible, and assuming I don't have something severely wrong with me, I believe it can be done.

26 weeks - stream of consciousness

So because I had IVF and/or ICSI, there is (apparently) a two- to four-fold increase in the probability that I will have a baby with heart defects.  Because of that, I was scheduled for a fetal echocardiogram at 26-27 weeks.  This 1.5 hour appointment is coming up on Thursday, and is the same as a regular ultrasound except they focus on the four chambers of the heart (blood flow, heart rate, structures, etc).  M couldn’t make it to this appointment, so I am bringing my mom.  I’m not sure if this is a mistake to bring “Mimi” (her new grandmother name!) or not.  I just worry that if something is wrong, the woman will never sleep again.  She’s a worrier x1000.  I mean, I shouldn’t throw stones because God knows I’m already a worrier and I don’t even have the baby yet…but she takes it to another level.    I am excited for her to see the baby real- time though, and to see how today’s technology works.  We all know that our parents’ generation didn’t have the benefit (or not?) of ultrasound so I thought she would appreciate tagging along.  I guess more on that next week.  Let’s just hope there is nothing wrong.

Along with being knee deep in financial matters (i.e. life insurance, the refi of the house, etc), house fix ups (ceilings painted, new front storm door, spring yard clean up) we also are anticipating our first birthing class this Friday night from 6-9pm.  It’s located at the Birth Center near our home (not attached to a hospital) and is called “Childbirth Education for the Planned Hospital Birth”.   I think the purpose is to review natural childbirth options when it seems like the odds are stacked against you- lol.  I’m anticipating topics such as “Yelling at nurses that try to force medication on you” and “Reacting to ignorant doctors when they doubt your God given ability to give birth”.  Wow, those are long titles.  Anyway, I am really looking forward hearing what they have to say as well as practicing labor positions and techniques.  I’m hopeful that this will correspond well to what I’ve been reading in my natural birthing books.

I was supposed to have lunch with my friend Jenna yesterday (who I haven’t seen in a year!) but unfortunately she was sick and had to cancel.  I hope to see her, and others I haven’t seen in a long time, at my shower at the end of April.  My mom keeps showing me all the cute things she’s gathered so far, as the shower is at her house.  My mom and mother in law are having separate showers for me, probably no more than 25 people at each.  The stuff my mom has collected so far is adorable, and she ran the menu by me as well.  It sounds delicious.  My mother in law showed me a proof of the invitations to her shower, and they are ADORABLE.    They have a giraffe at the top and blue giraffe print all over.  I will have to frame it and put it in the baby book I love it so much!  I’m starting to gravitate towards the boy baby clothes every time I go shopping, and they really do have some cute stuff out…I love everything with trains, camouflage, crabs, lambs, and giraffes.  I thought I wouldn’t like any of it but it’s just so cuddly I can’t help it!!

No new symptoms this week, other than my continued on again off again sleep patterns.  I had a doctor’s appointment last Thursday, and I gained about 1.5 lbs since last month, for a net weight gain so far of 22 lbs with one more week to go until my third trimester.  I expect to gain at least another 10, putting my total at 32 lbs.  I read that 25-35 lbs is considered “normal” for someone who started out with an average BMI, which I did.  Blood pressure was still normal (100/60) which made me feel good considering all of my heart palpitations and the fact that I can feel my blood pulsing through my veins. Overall, I’m pretty happy and don’t have any complaints.  I scheduled my glucose tolerance test in two weeks at a lab near me.  I’m going to go this week to pick up the yucky sugary drink that I’m supposed to have an hour beforehand so hopefully that appointment won’t take too long.  At that time they will also re-test my vitamin D levels (which were low last time) and my antibody screen (which was positive last time and we have fingers crossed that it is negative this time). 

I feel my little buddy move around all day long now.  He kicks and squirms and everyone can feel him from the outside now.  Sometimes I see him moving underneath my clothes. I’m glad he’s tumbling around in there because I’m sure sometime soon he’s going to start to run out of space.  I can’t wait to meet you, buddy!

25 weeks- Prayers to my friend J

Its things like this that make me recognize how lucky I am to be at 25 weeks.  I don’t take one single day of this pregnancy for granted.  J, a friend of mine, has been through two miscarriages and what looks to be like one failed round of IVF so far.  She had a positive beta and over the last couple of weeks things are looking more and more bleak that this will be a viable pregnancy.  They weren’t able to detect an embryo on the ultrasound and her HcG levels are falling.  She thinks pretty soon she will miscarry and doesn’t know what the next steps should be.  I have been there and hate that feeling- my heart hurts for her.  And today, thousands of teenage girls will get pregnant so we can see shows like “16 and Pregnant” and “Teen Mom”. 

My main man is a kicking machine and this Thursday I have a doctor’s appointment.  Not sure if I’ll be doing the glucose test in the next couple of weeks or what, but I’m dreading it.  I really hope I don’t have gestational diabetes or high blood pressure at this point.  It would kill my dreams of natural childbirth.  We have our first prenatal doula appointment Sunday March 25 and I cannot wait to start this process.   I am trying to keep positive about labor and birth and release control.  But it has not been easy to get into that mindset.  I’m almost finished the last of my birth books and will move on to some child psychology and “Happiest Baby on the Block”.   We have scheduled some work on the house in the next couple of weeks because we are trying to get all those last minute things finished before the end of May.  We got a call from our furniture store last week and our nursery furniture is going to be delayed by a month, which would put it here at the end of April.  No big deal, that’s why we ordered it early.

I am feeling especially thankful today for our gift, and every day that he is moving around in there is a happy day.  I have no complaints about pregnancy. I wish everyone could appreciate it the way those of us dealing with infertility appreciate it.   I am in no rush for this pregnancy to end.